Thursday, July 5, 2012

You're Gonna Hate Me a Little For This

I think things; I think a lot in fact. While I like to be around people and I love to be social, and I overshare details of my life to make people have a laugh, I really enjoy being by myself. If I had a choice I would come home and hang out with myself every day after work and only venture out into the world occasionally. I'm really good at entertaining myself. Or I should say that books, tv, internet and music are good at entertaining me. I don't know that I have a point to this particular post other than I just feel like writing. Bear with me, these thoughts will be sporadic and will probably not flow at all.

I am by no means an optimist, I want that to be clear. In fact, I am a cynical, judgmental, critical and difficult person. But in the last year I have realized how much I value life. I don't know how to explain it really. I mean God has given me infinite abundance of greatness in my life. I have more than a person needs, and I don't know what to do with it all. It's an amazing blessing what I have been given, and I just want to share that with everyone.

The problem that I've run into is that not everyone is as grateful as I am. I'm not saying they should be happy about everything all the time, God knows I'm not, but I wish they would at least put their lives into perspective. I don't know if it's cause I'm getting older or what, but I have found myself getting more and more frustrated with the general population. All I hear from people these days is complaints. Complaining cause they don't have this, complaining because they don't have that, trying to justify their actions and then complaining about the outcomes. It's frustrating.

I have had an extremely big problem in the last 8 or so months where I will tell people the exact opposite of what they say to me. If someone was like "I got hit by a car today and my car is fine and I am fine but now I have to deal with the insurance company to get my car fixed" I would say something like "ok, well let's be grateful that you're ok and that you are part of the 7% of the world that actually HAS a car."I am honestly not doing it to be difficult. I have thought about it a lot lately and I can't figure out why I feel the need to do it. I think it may be because whenever I get down about something I try my hardest to think of the opposite of how I'm feeling. I think that deep down my true intention is so that everyone else can be happy like I am, but honestly it just comes off as rude and unnecessary. Like I said, I'm working on it.
I want to just shake them and tell them to reassess their life choices if they don't like how things are going right now. The majority of the time people are in the situations they are because of choices that they have made. If you want something different for your life, DO something about it. Don't have money? Stop spending stupidly. Don't like your job? Look for a different one. Getting burnt out on school? Take a break. People want things to just happen, they don't want to put effort into it (please note I am one of those people. I wish I could just lose weight without working out or having to eat healthier) and it's driving me crazy.

I am not saying I don't do these exact same things. I am a hypocrite. I am a pot calling the kettle black. I am a messed up person just like you. I don't think less of you for doing these things, how can I judge someone for sinning in a way that is different than how I sin? All I'm saying is that I wish people would put their lives into perspective before going and playing the victim. My grandma used to tell me that no matter how bad things are, there is someone that has it worse off than you. And since I live in the United States of America, I know for a fact that is true. I may be struggling with something, but I guarantee I have it better than at least SOMEONE in the world.

I really just wanted to get this out into word form, it's something I've been chewing on a lot lately and something that I felt like needed to be addressed. I'm sure it's going to offend someone and someone will read more into this than they should, as this is the great interwebz and that always happens. If I have learned anything in my internet escapades, I've learned that everyone has an opinion on everything and no one will agree with you ever. Take care my friends, from one hypocrite to the next, I love you.


  1. Kels, I'm "new" to Blogger, though I've set up many over the years. I just spent probably 20 minutes trying to get into an account so I can tell you that I will NOT hate you, but LOVE you that much more for your post!!

    I think you and I are very kindred spirits. I do enjoy getting out and being around people, but Paramore's lyric "Nothing compares to, a quiet evening alone" always pops into my mind when I'm dancing by myself in the kitchen out here at The Homestead. I think I'm my own best company, which can be a downfall for a person like me. I can end up spending too much time alone and then feel awkward... which is pretty much a norm for me!

    There is nothing I do not agree with in your entry! Especially lately, nobody can touch my emotions. Life seems easy, seems simple as I've seemed to figure out the key to life - KISS. No, not the band. I know where your head is at. But, Keep It Simple, Stupid! Life is easy. Our problems are easy as long as we have our health!
    Money problems? I've got 99 problems but cash ain't one. If I don't need it, I don't buy it. If I want it, then I make sure I have the cash to buy it... after all my bills are paid, I'm debt free and I know that I've got a paycheck coming Thursday at midnight.
    Weight loss? I've still got LB's to drop, but I'm widdling down. It's simple math and common sense, but it's damn tough! Burn more then you consume!! I love me some fountain Pepsi, Coors Light and Cheeseburgers, but that doesn't make me want to wear a bikini. More importantantly... I've become addicted to Tae-Bo. No, it's not Insanity, but I can also walk normally the next day. I've said that even if I wasn't losing weight, I would continue to do Tae-Bo because of the mental high I get from it. If I come out looking like a dirty Gatorade commercial, I've done something right and then get 10 things accomplished afterwords, compared to the 2 things I may have done without motivating myself. Plus, seeing and hearing the effort you put in to a couple hours a week... priceless for an attitude. My swagger is back.

    I just agree with you 100%. There's rarely anything in life that you cannot change. Think you have it bad? Let's talk and I'll tell you a couple stories of people I love that have it bad. Their loss and strength helps me keep my head up. If they can get out of bed every morning and be meaningful, you bet your ass I'm going to smile at my life, but cry for them.

    I have SOO much to say on this subject as the last few months I've been skipping to the shower at 4:40am and "Bear Dancing" through my work days... I think I may have to start writing again! Thanks for the motivation, Sunshine! Hope I didn't ramble too much!

  2. Lara you're awesome!

    Mostly I'm glad that I didn't piss you off and that you actually agree with me.

    Yes, we are most def on the same page. Life is easy and we are beyond blessed to have it, so we should enjoy it and not get caught up in the little things!

    Thanks for the encouraging words, I really appreciate it!